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Welcome to Motherhood, Bitches
- The Real Guide to Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond
- Narrated by: Victoria Emes
- Length: 8 hrs and 29 mins
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Welcome to Motherhood, Bitches
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Summary
The real guide to pregnancy, birth and beyond.
I’m assuming you’ve picked up this book because you’re either curious about having kids, you’re currently up the duff, or you’re stumbling through the early days of parenthood with a mattress-sized sanitary towel between your legs wondering what the hell has just happened. That, or you’re killing time in WHSmith, waiting for your flight to Ibiza. You lucky bastard.
Either way, this book is your pregnancy, birth and postpartum BFF.
Welcome to Motherhood, Bitches is your one-stop, no-filter guide to everything from swollen vulvas and dinner-plate areolas; from shitting in labour to the horror of postpartum haemorrhoids; from mindless sleep deprivation to salvaging a sex life when your pelvic floor has hit the floor. But mainly, it’s a reassuring reminder that feeling slightly (or shockingly) out of control with a newborn baby human is entirely normal...we promise.
What listeners say about Welcome to Motherhood, Bitches
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 12-04-22
Not for me
It's not what I expected, but I'm sure others will love it. I hadn't realised it was an instruction manual on getting pregnant and giving birth. That's as far as I've got, but if that's what you're into, you'll like it.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Jo-anne Keenan
- 29-03-22
loved this so real!
honestly bloody brilliant thanks for keeping it real . . . .. . .
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- cathleen cockin
- 22-03-22
Great book
So good and informative about what to expect when becoming a mum. I really enjoyed it and listen whilst trying to get pregnant and again once I was a few months on.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- M
- 21-01-23
Entertaining, a bit OTT
It had some very interesting ideas and information laid out in an easily accessible way. Adding her own experiences was nice, as was the way she spoke about loneliness. Overall I enjoyed it, but sometimes she has a tendency to catastrophise. If I hadn’t have previously had a baby (big age gap, hence why I am reading up on it again) I would be pretty terrified by things such as breastfeeding and getting hemorrhoids. Neither of which were issues for me last time, in fact breastfeeding was a beautiful time. She made it sound as if I was a rarity, but I know plenty of mums who breastfed fine and loved it. There were some things she presented as a fact which are more her experience. So take this with a grain of salt.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- CorkysMrs
- 18-03-23
A frank & unashamed view on birth & motherhood
Loved every second. The way the author/reader is unashamedly frank with her audience about exactly what to expect pre & post birth made this an amazing listen. I am currently 31 weeks pregnant myself & found it very relatable.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anonymous User
- 16-03-22
Hilariously honest
Absolutely excellent, provides no nonsense informed information while being honest and real and utterly relatable and approachable.
Also, it’s hilarious - listened to this on a round trip from Dublin to Kerry and had to pull in from laughing while Victoria was describing her very traumatic trip to the piles doctor!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Anne Kennedy
- 18-03-22
Informative & hilarious
Thoroughly enjoyed this book and learned a lot along the way. well worth a listen thank you!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 24-10-22
strongly recommend for new and prospective parents
This concisely sums up the turmoil of parenting, and the hilarity.
More evidence based and factual than I expected but also more charming and comforting than I expected too.
Only note regarding edit is the wording in one aspect - all parts of health care are *offered* therefore can be accepted or declined.
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Overall2 out of 5 stars
- Amy
- 12-05-22
Not for me
Entertaining enough but not informative. I returned after a couple of chapters. I liked the fact the author was trying to give a more realistic account of pregnancy, birth and motherhood but without any information to supplement the narrative you don't really get any further with understanding pregnancy, birth or the early stages of motherhood. So for me it lacked a purpose and I soon lost interest.
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Overall1 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Catalina
- 09-07-22
Alien in my uterus ?
I am Sure I don’t have an alien in my uterus… I don’t like the approach of this book to the pregnancy
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