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Brothers, Sisters, Strangers cover art

Brothers, Sisters, Strangers

By: Fern Schumer Chapman
Narrated by: Gabra Zackman, Fred Sanders
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Summary

A warm, empathetic guide to understanding, coping with, and healing from the unique pain of sibling estrangement

"Whenever I tell people that I am working on a book about sibling estrangement, they sit up a little straighter and lean in, as if I've tapped in to a dark secret."

Fern Schumer Chapman understands the pain of sibling estrangement firsthand. For the better part of 40 years, she had nearly no relationship with her only brother, despite many attempts at reconnection. Her grief and shame were devastating and isolating. But when she tried to turn to others for help, she found that a profound stigma still surrounded estrangement, and that very little statistical and psychological research existed to help her better understand the rift that had broken up her family. So she decided to conduct her own research, interviewing psychologists and estranged siblings as well as recording the extraordinary story of her own rift with her brother - and subsequent reconciliation. 

Brothers, Sisters, Strangers is the result - a thoughtfully researched memoir that illuminates both the author's own story and the greater phenomenon of estrangement. Chapman helps listeners work through the challenges of rebuilding a sibling relationship that seems damaged beyond repair, as well as understand when estrangement is the best option. It is at once a detailed framework for understanding sibling estrangement, a beacon of solidarity and comfort for the estranged, and a moving memoir about family trauma, addiction, grief, and recovery.

©2021 Fern Schumer Chapman (P)2021 Penguin Audio

Critic reviews

“Moving...Chapman’s at her best when speaking about the vulnerability required of both sister and brother to repair their relationship. This reflective tale both captivates and educates.” (Publishers Weekly)

“Fern Schumer Chapman is a superb writer. In this stunning family memoir, she fearlessly probes the 40-year estrangement from her brother and chronicles their uneasy road to reconciliation. Along the way, she deftly weaves in pertinent social science research, capturing the voices and insights of hundreds of people suffering from sibling alienation. Brothers, Sisters, Strangers deserves to be read and discussed for years to come.” (James B. Lieber, Pulitzer Prize-nominated author of Friendly Takeover

“A primer in mending familial fences blended with an affecting memoir.” (Kirkus Reviews)

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Amazing book

I have listened to this book twice already and will probably listen to it several more times. It has been my anchor of hope and my solace. I have been painfully separated from my sister for a few years now and I long to find a way back. There was a lot of good advice and resources. The stories were comforting too and I could relate to a lot of it. There were things shared that I have never heard before that I thought I was alone in experiencing. Now I know that I am completely normal and just the same as everybody else experiencing estrangement. It is a painful process.

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