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  • Blown Away

  • Refinding Life After My Son’s Suicide
  • By: Richard Boothby
  • Narrated by: L. J. Ganser
  • Length: 5 hrs and 31 mins
  • 5.0 out of 5 stars (2 ratings)
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Blown Away cover art

Blown Away

By: Richard Boothby
Narrated by: L. J. Ganser
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Summary

This powerful memoir follows a father’s journey to make sense of his world after losing his son to addiction and suicide.

Fifteen years ago, Richard Boothby received a fateful call from his ex-wife that their 23-year-old son, Oliver, was dead. Although he had been dreading this news, given Oliver’s prolonged struggle with drug dependency, nothing could have prepared him for the devastating shock. He became obsessed with uncovering the truth of why Oliver shot himself—had he been self-medicating an undiagnosed mental illness?—and what they could have done to prevent it.

In an attempt to stem the pain, Boothby turned to psychoanalysis. He was no stranger to the concept—as a professor of philosophy, he had focused his career on the intersection between psychoanalytic theory and contemporary philosophy—but this was far from an academic exercise. Through his time in talk therapy, as well as psychedelic experiences in a research study on psilocybin, he would gradually find a sense of acceptance of the unknown, and a renewed appreciation for life.

Exploring the epidemics of substance abuse and gun violence from an intimate perspective, Boothby’s poignant account of grief shows how the death of a loved one can in some ways bring us closer to them and ourselves.

©2022 Richard Boothby (P)2022 Blackstone Publishing

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A beautiful, sad, tribute to Oliver. Deeply loved

I lost my own precious son to suicide in 2020. I have read many books and listened to many podcasts in my quest to find out how other parents feel after such an unfathomable loss. I have listened to this book three times and will listen to it again.
I love the way Richard conveys the shock, disbelief, and never-ending questioning about his own part in his son's death. The guilt trip is unbearable, and I know all parents who are suffering this specific loss feel the same. No one can truly understand unless they have been through it. I found Richards voice comforting and could understand every thought he had regarding Oliver's death, childhood, and memories, and it truly resonated with me. This book was written 15 years after Oliver died, but every word felt as though it had just happened. Sadly, that's how it is for us parents bereaved by suicide...it never becomes a distant memory, it becomes part of who you are. The depth of grief is a measure of love, and love for your child is forever, and all the memories are burnt, like a brand into your mind and soul. Thank you for writing this book, Richard. It is a beautiful tribute to your son.
Oliver...with love

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Blown away by Richard’s book

I met Richard (Rick) personally at a conference, where he talked about his son’s suicide. Hearing his story touched me so deeply that I decided to read his book. I am blown away by the fact that it contains even greater depths than I had already experienced in meeting him.

So, why would you - if you haven’t met Rick - read this book, and not someone else’s? I imagine that anybody who went through the excruciating experience of losing their child to suicide has an interesting story to tell. But Rick isn’t just anybody. He is a professor in philosophy, an expert on psycho-analysis, and - interestingly - a subject in several psilocybin studies. On top of all that, he is an amazing storyteller.

Being taken by Rick through his whirlwind of experiences, memories, hallucinations and philosophical reflections leaves me stunned by the universality of his wisdom and hard-won self-knowledge. One of my favourite gems is his psilocybin-induced epiphany on the nature of reality: the universe is God, experiencing himself through us. God is like an astronaut, and we are his many spacesuits ;).

In the end, although deeply personal, this book is not about Rick. It is a book about everybody. Whether you have already lost a loved one or not (yet), this book will blow your mind and leave you deeply touched.

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