A must read for childfree-by-choice women

I really enjoyed this book. I found Ruby’s story and opinions on motherhood very relatable. I also appreciated the depth of the childfree research that Ruby carried out. Having listened to the audio book on my work commute, I’d also like a physical copy for my bookshelf!

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Validation!

Bought this after listening to Ruby’s podcast, and was not disappointed. She articulates much of what I feel as a woman without kids, together with providing an interesting insight into why we feel this way in today’s society. Definitely recommend for those without kids. I wonder how much those with kids would enjoy it given it challenges why women have kids in the first place. But I think it would be useful for them to do so, as it may bring a greater appreciation of a different life path taken to theirs.

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1 person found this helpful

amazing book.

Really resonated with me! Author gathers many of the questions and concerns of people that consider if they want children or not. I totally recommend.

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A compassionate and sensitive exploration

This book has really helped me make sense of my own experience. The authors analytical mind balanced with her openness and sensitivity was a powerful combination for exploring this topic. I would highly recommend.
I really enjoyed the narration by the author.

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Indispensable

I’m so grateful for this book. Vital, healing reading for any woman questioning her options and her choices.

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I have 3 boys!

I wish i had this book 20 years ago, i knew I didn’t want kids before i was 30 if at all, but i have had 3 boys, it does enter me automatically into the i have kids club but that about all.
If you don’t want them I don’t think you owe anyone an explanation, ever, no matter who they are or their opinion, it’s not their life it’s yours.
If you want kids please only have them if you are happy for them to life this life, not one you dream for them. Get real!
And only for them, not to make your life better, because it won’t be better with kids, it’s hard really really really hard. And I don’t need to go into it, it just is.
Then consider the relationship you imagine you’ll be bringing kids up in, that might fail. Or they might not be that great a mum/dad. And the child themselves, might have a disability. My eldest son is Autistic and i feel guilty for putting him through this, a life and a system that is not built for him, a schooling system that is failing him. He’s been out of school for nearly 2 years! Consider this happening!
I adore my kids but I didn’t really think about it.
Oh and that ‘help’ you think might exist from grandparents or other friends or family. That does not really happen! Not like you’d imagine. They were done with you and don’t want to do it again, and probably if you asked them wouldn’t of done it if they’d of known.
You won’t die alone, you’ll be fine. And if you start to feel sad that you don’t or didn’t have kids. Thats because you are dreaming about what it could be like, the same dream we all had before having them.
It’s really hard.
We need to be living a natural communal existence for it not to be, this isolated primary (solo) parenting situation most find themselves in is failing.
Now it seems a mother also needs to have a full time job!
So why not just, not have kids and travel, holiday, sleep, make your own choices, pop out, go out out, stay in, move area, not feel horribly guilty, endlessly fearful, saddened by the state of politics and on and on. We can stomach our lot but that, you’ve never felt love like it also comes with you’ve never felt worry like it! And thats forever too!
You don’t need to explain anything to anyone, EVER!!!!!!!!

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Interesting, thought provoking, validating

Loved this book, it was all I wanted and more. It’s written in an insightful, vulnerable and thought provoking way. Useful for those weighing up the decision to procreate and also everyone else. So valuable!

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An important book

This book explores in depth the decision to have or not to have kids, and the economic, cultural, societal, emotional, and environmental factors surrounding this decision. The author challenges you to a process of self-inquiry, while weaving in the details of her own personal journey in an honest and relatable way. This book isn't at all smug or self-indulgent, and its primary focus is not how to live your best life as a woman without kids; it is deeper than that. I'm sure I will keep reflecting on this book (and the podcast of the same name) long after listening to it.

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You need to hear this

Warrington interrupts the extreme narratives on motherhood with this sensitive exploration. Essential 21stC reading.

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