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  • Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them

  • When Loving Hurts and You Don’t Know Why
  • By: Dr. Susan Forward, Joan Torres
  • Narrated by: Randye Kaye
  • Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars (26 ratings)
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Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them cover art

Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them

By: Dr. Susan Forward, Joan Torres
Narrated by: Randye Kaye
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Summary

Is this the way love is supposed to feel?

  • Does the man you love assume the right to control how you live and behave?
  • Have you given up important activities or people to keep him happy?
  • Does he belittle your opinions, your feelings, or your accomplishments?
  • Does he withdraw love, money, approval, or sex to punish you?
  • Does he blame you for everything that goes wrong in the relationship?
  • Do you find yourself "walking on eggs" and apologizing all the time?

If the questions here reveal a familiar pattern, you may be in love with a misogynist - a man who loves you, yet causes you tremendous pain because he acts as if he hates you.

In this superb self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward draws on case histories and the voices of men and women trapped in these negative relationships to help you understand your man's destructive pattern and the part you play in it.

©1986 Susan Forward and Joan Torres (P)2017 Tantor

Critic reviews

"Very important and much needed.... This how-to book could be a lifesaver." (Abigail Van Buren, "Dear Abby”)

What listeners say about Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them

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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

An absolute must read!

Very insightful and very helpful book. After listening to the audio book, I just had to buy a copy of the book for my sister who is married to a misogynist. Coming from a patriarchal society, there are so many misogenist around here that it is easy to assume that it's just the way men are. To keep a man, a woman must be prepared to give up her identity and be willing to endure all sorts of abuse at the hands of her husband, which only escalates over time. It's an epidemic and, sadly, it gets passed down to the next generation. I don't know what can be done to address this plague, but I'm glad that a book like this has been written to help people begin to address the problem at the individual level, it's especially helpful for women who live in developing countries and who do not have access to a psychologist's help. Thank you Dr. Susan for another masterpiece. I read your other book on toxic parents, and I think you are a very gifted psychologist, among the very best out there.

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5 people found this helpful

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    3 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Interesting but outdated.

Interesting read, but some of the ideas and opinions expressed are outdated at best and potentially dangerous at worst.
Forward often slips into victim-blaming language, referring to women having ‘allowed themselves’ (or their children) to be used, abused and controlled which good domestic violence/abuse awareness or support programmes now acknowledge is inaccurate, inappropriate and unhelpful.
Her advice (according to her supported by all experts in the field) is that a woman should leave an abusive partner the minute that the abuse becomes physical. This advice fails to acknowledge that ‘non-physical’ abuse can be just as bad, if not worse, than physical, OR that leaving the perpetrator is now known to increase risk of escalation of controlling and/or violent (even to the extent of murder) behaviour and therefore, most experts would NOT recommend leaving without having in place a safe exit plan. Further, telling someone to leave ‘no matter what’ can, in itself be perceived as victim blaming when there may be many and varied reasons why this is not possible.
Worth reading, if only to appreciated recent developments.
Narration quite ‘robotic’ and can be quite irritating.

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Excellent, very insightful

This was my first audible book, I found it gripping and hugely helpful. I particularly enjoyed the way it was written by using others experiences and telling their stories. it felt like listening to mini stories whilst gaining insightful information and help with my own personal circumstances

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