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Being Infinite

An Entheogenic Odyssey into the Limitless Eternal: A Memoir from Ayahuasca to Zen

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Being Infinite

By: Martin W. Ball
Narrated by: Martin W. Ball
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About this listen

In this very revealing memoir, entheogenic researcher, Dr. Martin W. Ball, Ph.D., details his quest for self-discovery, transformation, and liberation into authentic being. His journey takes him through struggles as a graduate student in Religious Studies, an unhappy marriage, explorations of numerous spiritual traditions, and deep into the mysterious realm of entheogens. The tale told here follows Dr. Ball through his practice of Zen meditation, his initiation into Mescalero Apache medicine traditions, use of peyote in the Native American church, ayahuasca and Santo Daime, and the explosive and life-altering event of experiencing five-MeO-DMT with the temple of awakening divinity and his first encounter with the true nature of being as God and universal consciousness.

A pivotal moment comes for Dr. Ball in 2007 at Burning Man, where he finally admits to himself that he is profoundly unhappy. In order to be true to himself and his heart, he must make radical changes in his life and dive headfirst into his quest for self-discovery. What unfolds is a profound and shattering process of uncovering the infinite nature of authentic being and his struggle to accept the reality that there is only God - that all of reality is one universal being of pure energy, love, and absolute awareness.

Dr. Ball has told his story before in bits and pieces, but this is the first time it has all been articulated in one place in an intimate and comprehensive format. Provocative, challenging, and radical, Being Infinite articulates Dr. Ball’s nondual perspective that developed from his entheogenic experiences and the profound transformations they made within his sense of self and understanding of the nature of reality and being. There are many psychedelic memoirs available, but there is nothing else quite like this work that listeners are sure to find engrossing, challenging, and maybe even liberating. It is a story that is both personal and universal, and has profound implications for anyone seeking after deeper self-awareness and authentic being, and lays the inspirational groundwork for anyone who is ready to move beyond being spiritual to simply being true, right here, right now. It is a tale of truth, and a tale of freedom from all self-created limitations and the very important role that entheogens, particularly five-MeO-DMT, have in this profound process.

Anyone who is interested in cultivating self-awareness, exploring entheogens, and moving beyond superficial spirituality will surely find this to be a radical edition to their reading list, and just might open a few eyes and hearts in the process. In the end, there is only One, and the task of each person is to discover this eternal truth for him or herself. It cannot be taught. It cannot be learned. It can only be discovered in the core of each individual’s heart.

©2014 Martin W. Ball (P)2019 Martin W. Ball
Biographies & Memoirs Heartfelt Thought-Provoking Hinduism Discovery
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Better than Valium

About ten hours too long. Save your time by skipping the self indulgent clap trap and going straight to the last thirty minutes where the secrets of the authors drug induced delusions are revealed. Unless of course you find it difficult to sleep.

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Infinite Being, Infinite Ego

Martin Ball is clearly a smart dude. As well as writing Being Infinite, he composed and performed all the music which ends each chapter. I found his autobiographical oddessy strangely compelling too, as he not only studied with Native American Shamans, but seems to have experienced a huge array of naturally occurring entheogen, including Psilocybin, Ayahuasca, Salvia divinorum, DMT, Peyote and culminating in 5-MeO DMT in his desire to awake to his own divinity.

Having said that, God evidently has a massive ego problem, as the closer Martin gets to realising he is God, and “overcoming ego”, the more dismissive and contemptuous he becomes of all other egos ie. anyone who does not agree with him. Being God means you KNOW reality, and thus any one else’s perspective is obviously just “ego projection”. Even the Buddha, it is revealed, is ‘holding on’ to his ego projections because he sits in the lotus position!

This for me is the central flaw in the book. For ‘Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly’. While Terence McKenna, chief among those accused of “ego projection” is (IMHO) delightfully mischievous, imaginative, humorous, and often self effacing ie. non-egocentric, in “Being Infinite”, Martin Ball seems obsessed with his own messianic status, which lends a tiresome heaviness to the book. There is little room for light, humour, or creativity here. When God speaks through him, it is to pronounce platitudes in a deep ponderous voice, dripping with gravitas. Yet, it never seems to have occurred to Ball to question whether this “God” might be his very own ‘ego projection’.

There is much to find interesting in “Being Infinite” - including the realisation, through use of entheogens, the we are divine, that “We are One Being”. This is what people like Alan Watts were saying 50 years ago. However, for me, Martin’s “God is Energy” comes too close to “God is Power”, rather than “God is Love”. The realisation which more properly leads to looking for the divine in the face of the Other - (eg. friends, enemies, strangers, animals) is consequently left almost unexplored in the book.

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