Listen free for 30 days

  • Dear Sexual Abuse Survivor: This Is the Guide I Wish Someone Had Written for Me

  • By: Sylvia Fraser
  • Narrated by: Annette Martin
  • Length: 4 hrs and 17 mins
  • 4.6 out of 5 stars (8 ratings)

One credit a month, good for any title to download and keep.
Unlimited listening to the Plus Catalogue - thousands of select Audible Originals, podcasts and audiobooks.
No commitment - cancel anytime.
£7.99/month after 30 days. Renews automatically. See here for eligibility.
Dear Sexual Abuse Survivor: This Is the Guide I Wish Someone Had Written for Me cover art

Dear Sexual Abuse Survivor: This Is the Guide I Wish Someone Had Written for Me

By: Sylvia Fraser
Narrated by: Annette Martin
Try for £0.00

£7.99/month after 30 days. Renews automatically. See here for eligibility.

Buy Now for £13.79

Buy Now for £13.79

Pay using card ending in
By completing your purchase, you agree to Audible's Conditions of Use and authorise Audible to charge your designated card or any other card on file. Please see our Privacy Notice, Cookies Notice and Interest-based Ads Notice.

Summary

This guide is about you, and me, and the other survivors you will meet. It's about healing from the damage that follows us into adulthood. Some survivors, like me, blackout all knowledge of the abuse for much of our lives. Some remember, but deny its emotional impact. We say, "It wasn't so bad. I got over it."

My book, My Father's House: A Memoir of Incest and of Healing (1987) was one of the first to break the taboo on Western society's shameful secret. After it became an international best seller, I heard from hundreds of other survivors wanting to share their stories. I spoke at therapists' conferences, and on TV panels across North America and Europe. This became my crash-course on sexual abuse as a disease of our times, and on healing.

In this shared voyage of self-discovery, we'll explore how child abuse continues to steal our adult happiness. I'll suggest exercises and ask you questions. Why? Because you - not me or anyone else - are the world's leading expert on you. This guide is about you - your past, your present, your future.

You'll meet Claire, who couldn't believe her father had abused her even though he'd been jailed for molesting other children. You'll meet Loretta, who remembered her seduction, at age 12, by the church organist, as a love relationship, until she learned the truth behind her throat hemorrhages. Since Georgina liked the things her abusive uncle gave her, selling sex for her college tuition seemed sensible, until miscarriages forced her to deal with her emotional damage.

An important step in healing is self-forgiveness. We'll also consider: Does healing ourselves mean forgiving our abuser? We'll examine how abuse may have affected our bodies. We'll look at insights, available to us through our dreams and even through fairy tales. We'll discuss whistle-blowing - to our families, to our abuser, and by writing a memoir. Our goal is a simple one: to better love and appreciate that face you see in your mirror.

©2017 Sylvia Fraser (P)2018 Sylvia Fraser

What listeners say about Dear Sexual Abuse Survivor: This Is the Guide I Wish Someone Had Written for Me

Average customer ratings
Overall
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    6
  • 4 Stars
    1
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Performance
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    6
  • 4 Stars
    1
  • 3 Stars
    1
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0
Story
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
  • 5 Stars
    6
  • 4 Stars
    0
  • 3 Stars
    2
  • 2 Stars
    0
  • 1 Stars
    0

Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Very interesting

Enjoyed every minute. My childhood experiences were a little different but the adult outcome was relatable. Thank you

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Thank you

Opened up doors and a language I have been struggling with go a long time.

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    3 out of 5 stars

distinctly average not bad.

didn't really tell you much ok to listen to If you have literally nothing else. forgettable

Sort by:
Filter by:
  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Michele K.
  • Michele K.
  • 10-09-20

Can’t get past the wrong and damaging terminology

You don’t “seduce a child”. You “groom a child”. You “abuse a child”. I had to stop listening after this phrase was used several times!

2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Meg Pryor
  • Meg Pryor
  • 22-08-20

More of the Same

There's nothing new here. Forgive yourself, forgive the abuser, blah, blah, blah. I wasted time.

2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Angel M
  • Angel M
  • 09-08-19

Good information + some unique exercises

I’m an advanced survivor going through it again in response to life’s changes. There were some new insights and fodder for discussion with my therapist. But no magic I’m afraid. There’s no magic book, I’m afraid.

2 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for Susan Jones
  • Susan Jones
  • 03-01-23

Enlightening

I am a massage therapist that works with many sexual abuse survivors and as a massage instructor noticed many of my students had sexual abuse histories. This book has helped me to understand more of the thought process of someone who has survived sexual abuse and will help me relate more to my clients and students. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    1 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for M. Fernandez
  • M. Fernandez
  • 11-10-22

Ugh

Sorry… I just can’t. The narrator’s perky and almost condescending tone are a HUGE turn off. Much of it is written as though the CHILD who was abused is capable of adult thinking and understanding.

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars
Profile Image for plumber_girl3
  • plumber_girl3
  • 30-11-21

Best book for healing

Outside of trauma therapy, this book has been so helpful for me to make sense of how the sexual abuse has changed me and dictated so much of my behavior. It’s an excellent tool for healing!